Monday, October 27, 2014

On Top of the World

I was listening to this song and my brain clicked on something. See, I struggle with this silly little thing. Some people call it depression I just sometimes like to call it getting little lost. It seems a weekly battle of not losing who I am, staying focused, and purposeful.

I'm not sure why but listening to this song made me think of the past and how I could have died in 2011/2012. It was a very real possibility that I wouldn't be here writing this or living this life. So why am I getting so down about work, school, and just life? 

I have been given a second chance. To live. To be all I "can be"(quoting a British friend who once told me to be all I can be. If one day you read this sir, I remembered).

But seriously, I wouldn't have been here. Working fast food, going to school, having one or two good friends doesn't seem so impossible when the other option was not living at all. 

No, I don't have a lot of friends. I don't have parties and social gatherings every week, or even month. I may just be a minimum wage employee who spends most of her time wasted on Youtube, online classes, and the typical college student stuff, BUT what a blessed life that is!!! 

When I remember where I came from...This IS the dream life. I'm always reaching for more, which isn't bad... but what a wonderful place I'm in right now. 
To have a life. 
To have chance to accomplish my goals.
To even just have one good friend.
To be Free.

*Sometimes I feel as though. I'm living the sequel to "To Save A Life".
 This what you do with the saved life. *

Sunday, October 19, 2014

2 Years

Today makes 2 years of living without my old self destructive ways.
It doesn't mean I haven't struggled with those things.
It just means it's been two years since the last time I truly gave in.
So I figured this calls for a post and a few lyrics since I'm just listening to music trying to find something fun to do today.


"They said we never would survive,
and I believed the lies,
and then there words were verified,
when I replaced my heart for your demise,
but you were always on my side."

I'm still getting over a cold/flu thing.
I've had quite a few auditions this week and things that are like one in a million of actually getting but still super fun to do! And who knows what God has in store. It would be super fun to do one of them.

Hmmm.. I suppose I should post my thoughts on reaching two years. Honestly, I don't have much thoughts. My life is so different now. I didn't even remember until I was writing down the date during church this morning. I was like "Oh yeah hey". I am happy to have reached another milestone.