Christmas Eve 2012!

Figured I'd post some christmas photos while I'm listening to some new music.

"You could beat the world. You could beat the war. You could move a mountain. Find yourself standing in the hall of fame. The world's gonna know your name. You can go the distance. Run straight through hell with a smile. Do it for your people. Never gonna know if you don't try. Do it for your country do it for your name cause there's gonna be a day where your standing in the hall of fame. The world's gonna know your name. You burn with the brightest flame."

"Don't you know i'm not your ghost anymore, you lost the love I loved the most. I learned to live half alive. Who do you think you are? Running round leaving scars. Collecting your jar of hearts, and tearing love apart."

"Make me lose my mind."

 

 

 

"All I get from you is double double talk talk. Every single day day. Every word you say say." -Double Talk, Emily Osment

"What's it like for you, on your own, what do you do? Do you like to chit chat to yourself?"-Chit chat

Dec. 22, 2012- Headaches

So this morning at the beautiful hour of 7am I woke up with a severe head ache.It felt like ears were gonna start bleeding and my hand starting hurting then my back, inside my ribs, and then to my foot. It was so weird.

Drift- Love this song

I also love this song "Chit chat". It's catchy. There are so many good songs out there that need to be on 93.3 but yet... every song on 93.3flz sounds like the same old computerized stuff. I'm going to be recorded in January :) I'm hoping to try to sell it on Itunes. Email me if anyone out there is interested and would buy something I record. I you don't know what I sound like just go to www.youtube.com/Rebecadonovan1

So today i'm just laying in bed on ibuprofen cause my head is killing me. Tonight I'm going to an elf party. Hopefully my head will stop by then. It's kinda nice to just lay around.

I think I'll post some more photos. 

Today I Am Alone

My head hurts...

My eyes feel dry. I think I cried in my sleep last night from the way I woke up. Must've had a bad dream...

I'm not sure why but I don't feel safe. It's like I feel fine but I don't. I'm exhausted but I have had plenty of sleep and everything feels different. I'm not sure what's going on with me. My head has been hurting. I've had weird vision problems. My behavior hasn't been me.

Today I decided to ignore the world.. even though I know i've been struggling. It felt good. I'm sorry to the friends I ignored though. I wasn't meaning to be mean to you. I guess I just needed to be alone. I got a lot of thinking done but didn't really come to any conclusions.

Ok. Let me get the facts out.
Facts: I'm struggling with food again. I've been eating but the past two days I haven't had too much real food. I did my devotions for the first time in a week today. Which was good but I still feel this numb feeling. i'm broken hearted again over the fact that I continuously make my friends upset and annoyed with me... but at the same time i'm tired of pleasing them. I don't really care. I just kinda wanna do whatever I want to and not care... i don't know. My head really hurts right now. These random headaches lately have been killing me but I'm restraining from telling my mom every time cause I show symptoms of not good stuff but we don't have the money to take care of that so I hate worrying her. 

I'm excited for Christmas :)

I've told friends how I feel like i'm a mess.. and I know there's not much they can do. I kinda wish someone was here to at least just be a company.. but at the same time im ok alone. But am I? I don't trust my instincts today. It just doesn't feel safe.

Being numb right now is a blessing.

I really love the song "Drift" by Emily Osment right now. It's so simple but good. How can I sleep so much yet still be so tired? I've done nothing today. Haha... HAHA... "faded into hazy... and sinking strong." -Drift

Look it up. Drrrifftt away.

Dec. 1st-2012

Heading to surprise party tonight. Figured i'd post some photos I like..